Mom Says Daughter, 9, Lies in Order to Be the Center of Attention. Now She's 'Tired' of Her Behavior and Worried for Her Future Kayla GrantOctober 21, 2025 at 3:00 AM 0 Getty A stock photo of an angry little girl.
- - Mom Says Daughter, 9, Lies in Order to Be the Center of Attention. Now She's 'Tired' of Her Behavior and Worried for Her Future
Kayla GrantOctober 21, 2025 at 3:00 AM
0
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A stock photo of an angry little girl. -
In a post on the parenting subreddit, a mom is sharing that their 9-year-old daughter has been "struggling" when she isn't the center of attention
The original poster (OP) went on to explain that her daughter claims to feel "ignored and excluded," but thinks she's "making up versions of reality that objectively aren't true"
OP asked for advice on helping her daughter navigate not being the center of attention
A mom asked for advice on helping her daughter navigate not being the center of attention.
In a post on the parenting subreddit, the original poster (OP) shared that their 9-year-old daughter has been "struggling" when she isn't the center of attention. She went on to explain more about the situation.
"She claims she feels ignored and excluded, but I've now witnessed a few of these scenarios first hand and it's really just that she isn't the focal point," OP wrote. "Everyone is acting normally and fine, but she thinks they are ignoring her or not listening to her. She is making up versions of reality that objectively aren't true."
Getty
A stock photo of an angry little girl.
The mom continued saying their daughter "feels sorry for herself" in these moments, causing her to lash out or shut down. She said that when their daughter is acting like this it's even less likely that people will give her the attention she wants.
OP shared that her daughter isn't "receptive to feedback," adding how it's impacting the 9-year-old's relationships.
"She isn't receptive to feedback about this and she's having friendship difficulties, which I fear will get worse because of these reactions," she added. "I've seen her friends try really hard to be good to her, and their parents are working with us too to support my kid because they know she's having a tough time, but she seems to have impossible main character expectations right now. Nothing her friends do seems to be enough to satisfy her. She's always got a chip on her shoulder."
"But it's not just one set of friends, it seems to be in many contexts. For example, she was upset at a recent family dinner because 'everyone was paying attention' to her cousin who lost her first teeth the day before," OP wrote. "It was like five minutes in a 5-hour event, but she was hysterical about it later that night, claiming nobody cares about her, just her cousin."
OP concluded her post explaining that she's growing "tired" of her daughter's behavior as her mom who loves her unconditionally and can imagine how others feel about it.
"Even I'm tired of her behaviour and I'm her mom who loves her unconditionally, so it seems likely only a matter of time before she permanently loses friends over this dramatic, self pitying attitude," she explained. "I'm also exhausted trying to support her through these challenges when her take is just so skewed and negative all the time."
She added, "Other parents who have been in similar situations, how did you help your kid navigate these scenarios better?"
Getty
A stock photo of an angry little girl.
Many fellow parents and Reddit users chimed in under OP's post to share their advice and thoughts on the topic. One commenter wrote that it's important for the mom to use "tough love" on her daughter.
"This is the age where tough love is very much needed. I know it sounds harsh but this is the early part of childhood where they're hitting that line of knowing better and learning how the world is bigger than them," they wrote. "It's important for them to understand this but you can't fix it without pretty straightforward dialogue."
They added, "Not hateful, but you do need to be very transparent and clear that manners and empathy are required."
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A stock photo of a girl with attitude.
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Another user wrote in the comments that they had a similar issue with their daughter, sharing how they handled it.
"I had this with my daughter when she was much younger. She's incredibly magnetic and as soon as she opens her mouth everyone nearby, adults included, leans in and gives her attention," they explained. "It was a lot for her to handle and it was very hard for her when attention wasn't coming her way, because she thought it was her given right."
"I explained that the attention will not always be on her, but that it could hurt to have attention taken away. I understood. I also said that when you give the attention away it can feel really nice for you as well," they added. "So we practiced what it would be like to ask someone else a question or direct attention to someone else."
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